Posted by: Jayme | May 28, 2007

Memorial Day

Memorial Day commemorates those who’ve died in military service.  In some ways it doesn’t seem right that so many people take this long weekend and have parties, picnics, barbeques.  Yet in other ways, I think it’s good to take the time to enjoy life, your family, and your friends.  I know if it wasn’t for my family and friends, I’d be miserable.  They truly mean more to me than I can express. 

I’m not someone who cries often.  It takes a lot for tears to fall.  I especially have a difficult time crying in front of other people.  I feel like it makes them feel uncomfortable.  I think sometimes people are afraid to bring up my babies, because not only do they not want me to feel sad or upset, but they don’t want to risk the chance I might turn into a blubbering mess and they’d have to deal with me.  But honestly, it means SO much to me when people ask me about them.  I love sharing my memories, talking about them, remembering.  It’s wonderful.

Today I was lucky enough that I got to spend the day with a good friend and her family.  I was able to talk about Elora and Connor with her.  I showed her some of Elora’s micropreemie sized diapers and clothes.  She got to see Raime’s footprints and handprints.  We talked of pregnancy loss, and how it affects you, how difficult it is, even if the loss is early on in the pregnancy. 

What I love about this particular friend, is that I can 100% be myself around her.  I don’t ever feel like I’m not a good enough mother, my house isn’t clean enough, etc.  I feel like I can talk to her about absolutely anything that comes to mind.   I don’t feel self-consious around her.  I love that.  It’s rare for me to be that comfortable around someone. 

 My Memorial Day was a good one.  Hopefully I’ll continue to have days like this.

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Responses

  1. {{{Jayme}}} I’m so glad that you had a special time with a friend. My husband is the only person that I can bare to share with and sometimes we are on different planets of grief.

    You are constantly on my heart and my entire family thinks that you are amazingly strong for all that you have been through.

    I do hope that you continue to have good days. I’m still in the mode where I want to be miserable…I can’t imagine feeling good, but I know from my last loss that it does come with time and I wait.

    Continually upon my heart…~Tammi

  2. Jayme,
    I thought that I read that Wednesdays are a hard day for you, and I just wanted to post and let you know that you are being thought of and prayed for.
    ~Tammi


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