Posted by: Jayme | February 28, 2008

Elora

Aaron’s been gone almost two months now.  I hate deployments.  Only six more months to go though… we can do it, we’ve done it before.

Been thinking tons about Elora lately.  I still don’t get it.  I was talking to some friends about it. I feel a thousand times better when I can find a purpose in my suffering, a reason things happened.  I think Raime’s purpose was to cement my relationship with Aaron.   She made us such a strong couple.   I believe Connor was sent to me to get me through that last deployment, the first time I had to be away from Aaron, my rock.   But Elora, WHY?  I just don’t get it with her.  I can’t find a reason why we’d get to have her for 9 weeks like that, and make so many decisions still affecting us (letting the boys spend the school year in NY for example), if we couldn’t keep her.   I hope someday there is some profound reason we had to go through it, so that I can make peace with it the way I have with Raime & Connor.

Why is it so much harder with Elora?  Is it because I *knew* her?  Is it because I’m missing Aaron so much right now?

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